sinking in

The other day I was on the phone with Jerry and he told me that he had just received rounds for his weapon, in preparation for heading on to Iraq. Until now, Jerry's been carrying his weapon everywhere, but it hadn't been loaded. Getting the rounds for the weapon made it all a little more real for both of us. By now, Jerry should actually be in Iraq, though I have not heard from him yet to confirm it and it may be days before he's able to contact me. It's really pretty scary to not know where he is, but to know that he's been traveling in a way that I've only seen in movies.

It's funny how the lonely hits. I had a pretty full day and was very productive, yet today, more than any other this week, seemed terribly lonely. Perhaps it was because I knew that Jerry was traveling today and facing more danger than usual. Or maybe it was thinking back to Thanksgiving and feeling like it was so long ago, only to realize it was just over a week ago...time travels slowly with him not here. Or maybe it's all just finally sinking in. But whatever the case, the day was full of downy clowny.

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Jerry called! He's arrived safely and I can't describe how relieved I feel. In fact, it wasn't until he called that I realized how worked up with worry I really had been. The other day I bought our annual Christmas ornament. I suppose it would have been smart for us to pick one out together before he left, but since we hadn't, I found one myself this week. I chose an angel, with the idea that she would be watching over both of us while we were separated. I guess that should've been a good indication to myself that I was pretty worried. There were several angels similar to the one I selected, but she was the only one cradling a heart in her hands:

I'm glad I chose her and glad that she's taking her job seriously...she's been taking good care of my Jerry Giant so far.