life is like a box of chocolates...

....you never know what you're going to get. That's not entirely true. You know that on a few days, you're going to bite into a chocolate and your tastebuds (and teeth) are going to be offended by the incredibly hard and stretchy pink center of that nasty strawberry (or other fruitish) filling. Those are the days you'll want to spit out the chocolate and try again. Saturday was one of those days. It seemed like Jerry and I just couldn't fit together. Days like those are so frustrating to me. Other people can step back and give each other a little space and know that some days are just this way. Me, I get upset and dwell on every little miscommunication, replaying all the subtleties of the day. Not one of my best qualities, I'll admit. You also know that a few of the chocolates are going to be rich and amazing, filled with caramel and nutty goodness. Those days are like August 6, 2005, the day I met Jerry. Or my wedding day. They're even like the night I spent around the dining room table in May with my family and my good friend Jason. Just thinking of those days brings a big ol' smile to my face and I can still taste the richness of the chocolate lingering on my tongue. You also know that most of the chocolates will be enjoyable, not necessarily special or decadent, but yummy all the same. Yesterday was one of those days. The bitter taste of Saturday's nasty strawberry chocolate had disappeared and was replaced by a sweetness that comes from spending a nice time with my husband, unencumbered by my dwelling on insignificant details. Of course, now you can buy whole boxes of your favorite chocolates. But that seems a little like cheating, doesn't it?

So, you may ask, "What's the deal with Hev carrying on (and on) (and on) about this box of chocolates?" Well, I got that quote stuck in my mind. And in typical Hev fasion, instead of just letting it pass through, I thought about it way more than most people would. You may wonder why it was stuck in my head to begin with. Last night, we had the pleasure of seeing a USO concert on the Schweinfurt post, featuring the Lt. Dan Band. If you've seen Forrest Gump, I'm sure you remember Lt. Dan, played by Gary Sinise (now on CSI: New York). (If you live in a cave and haven't seen Forrest Gump and have no idea what I'm talking about, both Lt. Dan and the chocolate quote are from the movie.) For the past several years Gary Sinise has been doing USO tours, entertaining the troops with the Lt. Dan Band, of which he is a bass-playing member. This is the first USO concert that I've seen and not surpisingly, it got me very emotional. Lt. Dan and all of the members of the band repeatedly expressed their gratitude for our soldiers. One of the songs that was played was written by a band member after her first experience on post and was very moving. As we go about the act of living life day to day, I forget the importance of what we're doing here. Not only the importance of what our soldiers do. But the importance of the family and friends that support our soldiers. Last night, I realized that I still have an outsiders view of army life. Having seen clips of USO concerts on television in the past, I always had a surge of pride for our troops and a feeling of sorrow for the people who led the lives that welcomed USO concerts. I never thought in my wildest imaginings that I would be on the receiving end of one of those concerts. And even standing there last night, in some ways I find myself still clinging to the idea of it not really being my life. Which makes me worry that I will not be prepared when the time comes to face the harsher realities of living the life we've chosen.

This whole post may lead you to believe that I'm a downy clowny. And really, I'm not. Perhaps a little pensive. But not downy clowny. I think it's good to be reminded of the greater 'why we're here.' And good for me remember the reasons why Jerry and I are here. Every day, I see Jerry becoming a stronger man, in so many different ways. And every day, I make a little progress in my own self-improvement. This is a good experience for both of us, as individuals and as a couple. One that's pushing us both and enriching our lives every day.