where does the good go? part two.

I may not know where the good went, but I know the moment that I found it again. And this picture captures that moment! I don't think my smile could have been any bigger or my heart any fuller during those first moments that I saw Jerry when he returned from Iraq! During the deployment, both Jerry and I did a bangup job of tucking the good away into parts of ourselves that we kept from each other. Instead we brought out the ugly and gave each other large doses of it! There were many times when I thought the good had gone from us entirely and that his return would just cement the fact that there was no good left between us. The deployment was hard. And it brought the worst out in us in terms of communication skills and expectations of each other. Did we learn from it? I hope so. Though I hope the true test of that never comes...another deployment.

I can say without hesitation that the good is back. Perhaps we were hiding the good from each other in order to protect it. Our reunion brought the good back. And not just in the superficial honeymoon way that was to be expected. The good runs deeper and stronger now as we face each day together and live our lives together once again. That doesn't mean that we're eating rainbows and pooping butterflies! We still have our issues. And I still have my temper! But we're working on things together instead of clashing and struggling against each other across the miles. I think that we have weathered something quite trying and, as a result, have grown considerably as a couple. I think the trial has brought us closer to each other than we've ever been. I'm not exactly sure I'd say that I'd do it all again to get to this place, but I'm glad that we're where we are. That we're together. That we've found our good and it's growing.

Now that I've given you the emotional update following the turbulent deployment, I can move on to less heavy subjects, such as our three week vacation to the states! Stay tuned...

fambly

It's been four months since I last updated the GiantPantz blog. It's been on my mind quite a bit, but finding the time to do it when I'm not feeling obligated to check off other things on my t0-do list has been challenging. You may have given up on me, and I wouldn't blame you. But I'm back and hope to post updates on a more regular basis.

It's amazing how limited my time is now that Jerry has returned. While he was away, hours stretched out like days. But now that he's home, I find that there are never enough hours in the day to take care of everything that I want to AND to spend quality time with the family, which has recently grown to include a precious little pug puppy! Meet our sweet Moxii:

We brought her home on Tuesday and she's a spunky 17-week old tiny pup (who likes to piddle on the floor!). Scooter's slowly warming up to the new baby, but has definitely been a little pouty. He also seems to think that he's puppy-sized now that Moxii's here...he can often be seen smushed up in the tiny puppy bed, for which he is way too big! Moxii loves big brother Scooter and follows him everywhere. Scooter acts like he's annoyed by it, but I think she's growing on him. Scooter's definitely embraced his role as rule enforcer. When he sees Moxii doing something that she shouldn't or hears one of us reprimanding her for doing something she shouldn't, he's there in a flash to stop her from her naughty behavior...too funny!

The other big (and obvious) news is that Jerry is home! He came home on 5 November and now his absence seems like a distant memory. Of course, the first days back were amazing! But it's interesting how quickly our spouses can be annoying and disruptive of the life we created without them! I say 'we' because I have friends whose husbands were deployed at the same time as Jerry and we all experienced similar feelings. During the year absence, we develop our own schedules, our own way of doing things, and our own way of running and ordering our homes. Then those men came home and messed up all our order, bringing with them smelliness and making it oh so challenging to keep our homes as nice and neat as when they were gone! In the weeks following their return, my friend and I exchanged daily griping about our messy husbands! Learning how to share our space again can be quite difficult! Of course that doesn't detract from the happiness of having our soldiers home; it's just another aspect of the post-deployment reintegration.

I have much more to share of the adventures of the last four months, but now the day is winding to a close and I have to be up early in the morning. It's good to be back :-)